The Language of We Back to the Language of We main page
Creating a common language base for relationships
Signal
We experience a signal as any cue — felt, perceived, or interpreted — that carries information between nervous systems or within a relational field.
Signals are how we share relational information between us.
They answer questions like:
Is this safe?
Are we aligned?
Do we need to adjust?
Is something off?
Most signaling happens before and between words.
What counts as a signal
Signals can take many forms, including:
Tone of voice
Facial expression and posture
Pace, timing, and rhythm
Silence or withdrawal
Emotional shifts
Bodily sensations (tightness, ease, warmth, contraction)
Changes in attention or presence
Some signals are intentional. Many are involuntary.
Both are real.
Signals are not messages
A signal isn’t the same as a clear message or conscious communication.
Signals carry information, not conclusions
They can be ambiguous, partial, or context-dependent
They require interpretation, attunement, and feedback
This is why misreading signals can create dissonance — and why naming signals can restore resonance.
Signals are relational
In The Experience of We, signals aren’t just “sent” by individuals.
They:
Arise within relational fields
Are shaped by context, history, and power
Change meaning depending on timing and attunement
Signals are always received in a field, not in isolation.
Signals guide regulation and resonance
Nervous systems continuously track signals to orient themselves.
Regulated systems read signals with nuance
Dysregulated systems amplify or miss signals
Resonance occurs when signals reinforce one another
Dissonance occurs when signals interfere or contradict
Signals are the raw data of relational intelligence.
Our one-sentence synthesis
We experience a signal as any relational cue that carries information about safety, alignment, and need — guiding how nervous systems orient and respond to one another.
