Our Practices
Foundational practices for embodying and expressing The Experience of We
Holding Space for Each Other
A quick start guide
Sometimes what we need isn't to be fixed. Not to be advised. Not to be made to feel better. Sometimes what we need is simply to be witnessed.
To have someone present with us while we experience what we're experiencing. Without interference. Without the urge to make it stop. Without being rushed through to the other side. Just someone steady, sitting with us in whatever is here.
This is holding space. Pure presence without agenda. And it's harder than it sounds, because when someone we love is in pain, everything in us wants to fix it. We offer advice, solutions, reassurance. We try to talk them out of their feelings. All of this comes from care. But it can also communicate something unintended: that their experience is too much, that it needs to change, that we can't simply be with them in it.
Holding space says something different. I am here. You can feel whatever you're feeling. I won't try to change you. I trust your process. I will stay.
One practice to try
Think of a person in your life who’s open to experimentation, and invite them into trying something new with you.
Five minutes of witnessing
One person shares whatever they're carrying. The other holds space.
The speaker shares freely. Whatever is present. It doesn't need to be organized or resolved.
The holder does nothing. No fixing. No advice. No "have you tried..." No reassurance. Just presence.
Stay connected physically. Eye contact, a hand on theirs, or simply being near. Your presence is the container.
When the urge to fix arises, breath through it. Notice the impulse. Let it pass. Return to being with.
When the speaker finishes, don’t rush to respond. A moment of silence. Then something simple: "I'm here." "Thank you for sharing that with me."
Five minutes. No fixing. Just witnessing. Notice what becomes possible when someone can feel without being rescued from their own experience.
The full guide, Holding Space for Each Other, has several practices for developing this capacity: offering steady presence, containing without fixing, working with the urge to rescue, building the skill of witnessing, and more. It also explores what holding space actually requires, how to hold space for difficult emotions, and why this form of presence is one of the most profound gifts we can offer.
To be witnessed without interference is to be trusted. Let us trust each other's process
If this resonates, we recommend trying …
Practicing Vulnerability Together
Processing Our Emotions Together
Navigating Trauma Together
